Finding out that a loved one is on hospice care can be overwhelming for many reasons. You may feel afraid, sad, anxious, or concerned for your loved one, their family, and yourself. Recognizing and understanding these emotions are significant first steps forward, and knowing how to support your loved one in hospice care best can give you peace, comfort, and purpose. You can become a supportive close friend or family member, which will bring meaning to your life and solace to your loved one as they near the end of life. 

Understanding What Hospice Care Is

Hospice care focuses on the care, comfort, and quality of life of patients who face a life-limiting illness where a cure is no longer realistic or desired. Choosing hospice care at home, residential facility, or hospital is not a last resort or giving up hope. Instead, it changes the focus of caregivers and the healthcare team from providing a cure to providing comfort and meaning. Hospice care is often a team effort, with the patient, family, and healthcare team making decisions together to help the patient live as comfortably and fully as possible. As a loved one of the patient, you can do a lot to love and support them throughout their experience.

Give Your Loved One Physical Comfort

Greet your loved one as you always have, whether a hug, a handshake, or a simple greeting. Physical touch brings comfort and can lessen pain, so don’t be afraid to hold their hand or give them a gentle touch. You can also provide physical comfort to your loved one, along with their healthcare team.

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We often hesitate to visit a loved one on hospice because we feel nervous or uncomfortable. Some worry about what to say or not say and how to act. Take a deep breath and visit anyway. You cannot change the situation, but you can influence how they feel and provide memorable moments you can both cherish and hold on to. Don’t avoid your loved one, and be the friend and person you have always been with them.

Alleviate Signs of Discomfort

The end of life often brings discomfort and pain, including breathing problems, skin irritations, digestive problems, temperature sensitivity, and fatigue. Be aware of these changes in your loved one and alleviate them when you are able. Some things that help alleviate discomfort include:

  • Lip balm for dried lips
  • Mild lotions for dry skin
  • Damp cloths for dry eyes or hot temperatures
  • Small amounts of food and liquid instead of large meals for digestion and dry mouth
  • Thin, soft blankets for extra warmth
  • Frequent repositioning and gentle massages to avoid bed sores and decrease general malaise

If you notice any persistent signs of pain or discomfort that you cannot alleviate, you can notify your loved one’s nurse or caregiver.

Give Your Loved One Spiritual and Emotional Support

The end of life can be a distressing and anxious time for your loved one, and you can be a calming and reassuring presence during times of distress. Visiting your loved one reassures them they are not alone and decreases feelings of isolation. Remember to include them in your conversation; instead of talking about them, speak to them, even if they do not respond. Being patient with your loved one creates an atmosphere of love and support they often yearn for. You can set a relaxing mood by providing soft lighting, soothing music, and light topics of conversation.

Improves cognitive function

You may feel uncomfortable around your loved one, but mindfully stay present to show you care. Don’t be afraid to share joyful and sorrowful emotions with them. Visit with them or read to them if they do not feel like talking. Join them if they are in another world or time and ask questions or reassure them instead of correcting them.

Be Willing to Listen

Be willing to actively listen to your loved one and try not to dwell on what you will say next. Instead, listen with your heart, ask clarifying questions when appropriate, and validate their emotions and experience. Try to avoid correcting them or moralizing your thoughts and feelings. Instead, just be there for them and show them through your listening and love that you are a supportive and safe friend to have around.

Help Your Loved One with Practical Tasks

Often, loved ones on hospice become anxious or concerned about everyday tasks they can no longer do. Ease their concerns by offering to help around their home or yard, whether doing laundry, getting the mail, watering plants, caring for a pet, paying bills, or completing daily household chores. You can also offer to keep family and friends up-to-date, make a meal or favorite snack, or decorate for holidays. Finding little things to do to ease your loved one’s and caregiver’s burdens is helpful and rewarding.

Help Your Loved One Access the Hospice Services They Need

Knowing what services hospice provides ensures you and your loved one get the help and supplies you need quickly and easily. Work with your healthcare team to understand what is available and what you need. Hospice offers many different services, including:

  • Pain and Symptom Management
  • Prescribed Medication Delivery and Administration
  • Access to Medical Supplies
  • Access to Medical Equipment
  • Relief for Caregivers
  • Emotional and Spiritual Support
  • Bereavement Support and Counseling

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Questions

If you do not understand specific instructions, procedures, medical terms, or resources, talk with your loved one’s hospice team. Having answers to your questions gives you the confidence and knowledge to be the best support you can be. Your hospice team wants what is best for their patient, too, and will not mind explaining procedures, re-teaching important tasks and techniques, and answering your concerns.

Find the Best Hospice Care for Your Loved One

If you or a loved one need hospice care, finding a hospice care team you can trust is essential. Dignity Home Health and Hospice work with you and your loved one to provide specialized and compassionate care in Utah, Salt Lake, Davis, and Weber Counties. With Dignity, you are not just a patient; you are family. Contact Dignity today for a free, confidential consultation.